A little about ME-unlucky in kentucky

Hello Bloggers!!!!


I am completely new at this! (any comments, tips, ideas, questions will be totally appreciated!)


I am a 28 year old mother of 2, married and living with my mother. You are probably wondering why, well it is one hell of a long story and I am sure that I'll get into that in my upcoming posts. I hear that blogging is the #1 stress reliever in my family, so I thought I would give it a try. My mother blogs, my aunt blogs, my uncle blogs and now I blog. I have two beautiful children, a 4 year old girl and a 16 month old boy. I am sitting here wanting to type something exciting about myself, but I really can't think of anything. I like to watch movies and I like listening to music. The only thing in my life exciting right now is how screwed up it is. I am jobless, my husband is jobless, we have no vehicle, I disowned my father last week , I live with my mother and I have a lung disease (that I don't talk about even when I am sick).


I met my husband in my home town of Lawrenceburg, starting out we had several ups and downs. He was a wonderful person, no one had ever treated me the way he did. He was charming, sweet, kind, loving and he made me feel good about myself. I just knew that he was the one, my soul mate. Me and my husband got married in April 2002. I was 5 months pregnant. We lived with my mother starting out. He worked at a job here in Lexington remodeling homes that had been burnt in fires or damaged by natural disasters. I didn't have a job, just small ones here and there. We got government assistance and moved back to our hometown of Lawrenceburg and that is when it all began, T-R-O-U-B-L-E. He worked at several small construction companies building houses. Around November of 2003 he got a job for a log home company building them. It was a good job, it was just what he had been looking for.


He was fixing to become lead man and have his own crew. In January I went and got a small loan so that we could get some bills caught up and get everything going on the right track. The day I went and got the loan I got a phone call from my uncle, at the time my uncle had been working with him. He told me that I needed to get to University of Louisville hospital quick. He told me that R***** had shot himself with a nailgun. I asked my uncle where he shot himself and all he would say was "get up here". Finally my uncle told me he shot hisself in the chest. I knew immediately that this wasn't going to be good at all. It felt like someone had hit me in the stomach and knocked the breath out of me. I was nauseated, I thought I was going to pass out. My mother in law drove us to the hospital and when we got there R***** was just getting out of surgery. I asked why he was in surgery and they said that the nail had hit his heart! They had to do open heart surgery and remove the nail, he was going to make it. Since then things have not been the same at all.


Our lives have been one big revolting, pile of horse krap ever since.


I can say things are starting to get better. Although it seems like i say that everytime it isn't getting better. You know, I can walk through a field and find 15 four leaf clovers but I can't find the right direction to take in my life. I am NOT looking for hand outs. I am not looking for sympathy. I am looking for a way to take care of my children without the help from the government and family members.

So this is DAY 1 in that journey and I would like to invite you on it with me.